How Aunt Helen Helps Me Embrace Post-Menopause

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Growing up in the early sixties, I learned about womanly things by eves dropping from the stairwell of our old farmhouse. When my mother and her sisters talked, whether it was over coffee at the red Formica table in the kitchen or sipping Rob Roys under the locus trees the backyard, the topic was rarely proper for a young girl’s ears.

Computers weren’t around yet. TV ads consisted of Texaco Gas and Tide. And the word “Menopause” was never mentioned, not out loud anyway.

One particular evening, I remember feeling very spooked when my aunts stood in the kitchen speaking in hushed tones. My Aunt Helen and Uncle Paul were mysteriously missing from the family gathering.

Aunt Helen, someone had said, had to go away for a while. Comments were exchanged. “Oh dear.” “Oh my.” “Poor thing is going through the change.” I could hear worry in their voices, but I was completely confused. As a naïve adolescent, I was certain ‘The Change’ was another word for Black Death.

It’s hard to believe that only 50 years ago, doctors who were held in very high-esteem, didn’t know very much about menopause, especially if a woman displayed any signs of depression or anxiety.

Aunt Helen had, apparently, exhibited some depression and odd behavior. Little was known yet about Hormone Replacement Therapy in the early 60s and antidepressants were unheard of. How unfortunate for Aunt Helen. She was institutionalized and given shock treatments, a method used back then for menopausal women who needed to settle down or ‘snap out of it’.

For years after that, any mention of Aunt Helen had a phrase attached: “She was never right after “The Change”. It was true. The Aunt Helen I knew went from a vibrant, sweet woman who tapped her feet to the music to a person who sat quietly, unsmiling, and wary of anybody who attempted a conversation with her.

Luckily, today’s boomer women have access to enlightened physicians and plenty of information about menopause. The period of change that our bodies go through can range from depression, anxiety, mood swings, and memory loss. And let’s not forget hot flashes, weight gain, bone density loss and the list goes on and on.

The great part of being a menopausal woman today (other than worry-free sex and no more maxi-pads/tampons in the bathroom closet) is that we don’t have to go it alone. We have knowledge and options everywhere, and we better darn well use them to ensure a vibrant quality of life.

Sometimes, I get tired hearing the dangers of HRT, meno-pudge, and the hype of new research that the media continues to drill in to our brains. But then I think of Aunt Helen and realize that I don’t have to listen from the stairwell anymore.

I have options. I’m a lucky boomer woman. :)

 

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Sleep More hours and Lose Weight? Okay, Why Not?

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You know me, I tend to be a positive thinker (snort), but when I heard Brian Williams on NBC news last night report that researchers from the University of Washington have discovered that 9 hours sleep may help with weight loss, I had to cock my head a little bit.

Don’t get me wrong, as a writer of health topics, I love new research and as a women who’s struggled to lose 30 pounds since menopause, the idea of losing weight while asleep was music to my ears.

But, as I continued to listen to Brian in his folksy, midwestern manner, I wanted to believe, but the east coast skeptic in me raised its ugly head.

According to the research study, sleeping at least nine hours a night may suppress the fat gene that many of us have that leads to weight gain. Notice the word ‘May’. Check out the video.

My partner, appalled at my snickering at poor Brian’s announcement, suggested I start sleeping 9 hours like he does instead of my usually 7 hours. I looked over at him and the crack-pot in me wanted to say, “Why – because it’s working so well for you?”

But, I held my tongue and said, “okay, honey, I’ll try it.” And I did — last night. After all, who can’t use a couple extra hours of sleep, especially we fat geners.

Nobody’s going to call me a cynic. Yeah right. :)

 

 

This blog is reposted on Vibrant Nation

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Fat, frustrated vegetarian goes mad

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I went to my doctor last week for a follow-up visit. The blood tests ratted me out. My cholesterol levels were over the top.

What’s confusing is – I’ve been watching my calories and walking 3-5 times per week since January. I’ve lost 7 pounds. Apparently, that’s not enough.

My new doctor (a skinny, young blonde, by the way) tried to convince me to go back on statin drugs. The same meds that prompted me to call her in January.  The statins had caused my whole body to throb with pain for months, including the bottoms of my feet.

When I refused the meds, she recommended aerobic exercise and a vegetarian diet. Not even fish or eggs. Apparently, she thought I’d give in and take the meds. Wrong!

Fool that I am, I told everybody that I was becoming a vegetarian. Of course, the expert advice came rolling in.

“You have to eat fish –it has Omega 3 vitamins.”

“They say you need eggs now, for the choline. Does your doctor want you to have Alzheimer’s?”

“You should cut out sugar. My coworker cut waaaay down on sugar”

“Vegetarians aren’t healthy”

 “Maybe you should go off those anti-depressants”

“Walking is not enough – join a gym”

“Stop Drinking – not even wine”                               “Eat Oat Bran

“Vegetarians can eat Chicken”

ARRRRGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

After leafing through vegetarian magazines and skimming over diets recommended by Dr. Oz, Dr. Weil, and every doctor on WebMD, I made up my mind – let’s do this thing.

I stepped up my walking routine from 30 – 45 minutes 5 times a week. I haven’t touched any kind of food that once drew a breath, and cut down my sugar intake to one square of dark chocolate a day.

A week later – you would expect to see at least a 1-pound weight loss, wouldn’t you? Well, guess what? Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

I am not happy.

 

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Mid-life Comfort Zone – Are you in or out?

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My friend (I’ll call her Tia) and I live 5 minutes from each other, yet, we haven’t seen one another since our last Starbucks meet-up a year ago. Too busy, too lazy, too something, but we finally met for coffee this morning.

I won’t go into detail about Tia’s life, but as many women our age (she’s 52), she’s not all that happy in her marriage, her long commute to work, and general health issues at the moment (nothing serious, dental implants, intermittent periods, you know the story).

I was expecting an updated version of the same ol’ thing, which would have been fine. But instead, I was stunned and thrilled with her news.

Tia is moving from Fort Lauderdale, Florida to Pittsburgh, Pa. Now, most people would ask, WHY?! Me, I quoted the words of another famous Kennedy, ‘Why Not’?

Because of changes in the company where she is currently employed, Tia’s job is in jeopardy. How many times have we heard this type of story on the nightly news.

But, when a former boss heard about her situation,  he gave her a business opportunity that she couldn’t refuse, to become his partner in running a bakery in Pittsburgh.

This may not sound like a great reason to pick up and move to a city that only gets about 5 days of sunshine a year, but here’s the good news – she’s always dreamed of owning her own company and at the age of 52, she’s trusting her instincts and going for it.

Her hubby has chosen to stay in Florida for now, but hey, a long distance relationship may be just what they need to shake up 33 years of a lack-luster, but devoted marriage.

Could Tia fail? Of course, it’s a risk. She could stay put and look for another dead-end job that saps the life out of her or she can a risk and carve out a different life for herself. She’s putting herself first. OMG, a woman putting herself first? The horror! :)

The point of this post is really about women in the middle stages of their lives. It’s about growing, changing, and doing something you’ve always wanted to do before you die – even if it’s scary. It’s about being happy, and most of all, it’s about living.

What’s your opinion? Should a boomer woman take risks and accept new challenges or stay safely within her comfort zone?

 

 

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Boomer Women Workout

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Easter is over, ham leftovers have been to the split-pea. soup, it’s time to get back to the workout schedule with a slightly revised reposting from January to urge we boomer women back into workout mode.

Step 1 – take a walk, it won’t kill ya.

I walk almost every morning. After finally figuring out how to download my favorite music on the iPhone/iPod, I have a playlist stuffed with classic rock. A little Creedence Clearwater Revival gets me stepping to the beat.

Step 2 – eat less, you don’t always have to clean your plate.

In January, I downloaded Loseit my iPhone.

Loseit makes it so easy to count calories and keep track of exercise. And I need easy. You can do it online or on your phone.  I find that writing down what I eat everyday can really help slow down calorie intake. And the best part – it’s almost as good as Weight Watchers, but it’s free. (UPDATE: I’ve lost 7 pounds since January. Not great, but it’s much better than gaining.)

Step 3 – Workout with Jane Fonda.

On the days that I don’t feel like walking, I change it up with the help of Jane Fonda. She’s 74 and is still kicking-butt, not the same as in the 70s, but that’s the beauty of these new Prime Time DVDs. They are specialized for the boomers and beyond.

Her moves center around the mid-life aged body and the middle-aged brain. We need both to maintain our quality of life for many, MANY years to come.

Let’s get moving boomer women – we can do it!

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